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Ideas That Build Resilience & Create Meaningful Change

One big messy life

Want to know the scariest part of my life? I don't have it all put together, not even close. For those of you who know me, you know this doesn't sound right. I put on a pretty good show, or so I think. Here's the deal. Our lives get messy. The more fulfilled they are, the messier they get. We are taught that becoming an adult means all our ducks will be nicely in a row. But wait, how the hell do ducks get in a row, no one ever mentions that part!

We assume Martha Stewart and Oprah Winfrey have perfectly crafted planners and never lose their keys. Or that Lebron James never gets the dreaded man-cold. But the truth is that of course they do! And what's worse? Martha and Oprah probably have like hundreds of keys they lose and Lebron, well he has to play no matter how crappy he feels. At least we only have one or two sets of keys to lose and can hopefully pull a sick day here and there.

The Truth: Life gets messy. The harder you try to keep it under control the messier it gets!

The Solution: First, we open up the doors a little and let those closest to us in on the secret. Our friends are not shocked to find fast food fries in your couch (or if they are, you need new friends), our family will not judge the millions of undone projects around your home. So host that gathering already! Let people in and have fun, because let's face it, without fun, the hard parts of adulting just suck.

At work, are you jumping from project A, to project D when project C should have your attention? Stop. Stop for one minute and write out a list. Seriously, right now, write down your top 3 priorities. If you have time to read this blog, you have time to make a list. Now re-read those priorities. Are they really necessary? What's the hardest part of them that keeps you avoiding them? Is it really that hard? Can you knock one of them out right away? Just do it, do whatever you need to get the ball rolling on that project. We often think projects are difficult. They aren't. Starting projects is the hardest part. Once we get moving, the motion sort of feeds on itself until the task is done.

I'm notorious for doing 5 little things on the way to the one task I set my eyes on. Some call that efficient and some days it is, but most days its my form of procrastinating! When time is limited, I run around like crazy doing little tasks without making any real progress on the big stuff. In reality, that's my way of working without a plan. When I have a plan and know what NEEDS to get done, I focus laser-like on that item and bypass all the messes and other chores I think I should be working on. And oddly enough, because of the focus, I got what I needed to done, and have time to do the other things. Wait, how did that fry get there?! AHHH!

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